What People Really Think

I was with Elijah tonight as he was getting a haircut. The hairdresser was making small talk while I waited, and while she snipped. She asked me what I did for a living. “I’m a pastor,” I said. She stopped snipping, looked up at me and with a puzzled tone asked, “Really?” She obviously thought I was teasing. She quickly caught on that I was not kidding and said, “Not that you couldn’t be, but aren’t they usually old, and not cool? You look too cool to be a pastor.” She brought the conversation back around to that topic at least three times during the haircut. I told her that I was on staff at a “cool” church and that we work hard at being relevant and normal. We talked a bit more about it and I could tell that something in her mind was being challenged. It seemed like for the first time she was considering that it's possible for pastors, believers in Jesus for that matter, to not live with their heads in the sand. They can engage culture and even...enjoy some of it. Did a pastor just write that? As we finished, Melody and I left with the kids and I was glad that I could help to break a stereotype that she had set up in her mind.

Look, I’d be lying if I said that it wasn’t a flattering thing to hear. I mean, no one really wants to hear that they are “un-cool.” But, I have to say that it also got me thinking…and I didn’t like where my thoughts led. I wonder how many other people have the same perception when it comes to pastors, followers of Jesus, the Church. And if pastors are believed to be un-cool and out of touch, what must so many people think about the One we are supposed to represent? The Church still has a lot of work to do in demonstrating that God is extremely relevant, and that He is many things, but He is not an old man upstairs out of touch with the lives people are living.

I wish I would have followed up her question with a question of my own: “What do you think God is like?” The good thing about hair is that it grows. Next time Elijah gets a haircut I plan on asking that very question.

Just Say No?

How do you keep from burning out in ministry? What do you do to ensure that the ministry God called you to be a part of is the one that you fulfill? Paul tells Timothy: Fulfill your ministry (2 Timothy 4:5). I love how Paul personalizes this for his young friend. Paul knows that Timothy isn’t responsible for fulfilling anyone else’s calling or ministry, but his own. And for some reason, he must have known that Timothy needed to hear those words. Maybe Timothy was a guy who felt pressured because he saw all kinds of needs, but not enough volunteers to meet those needs; so he tried doing too much and Paul knew that would end in burnout. Maybe Timothy just leaned toward taking on too much. Perhaps he was a highly driven person who tried doing it all. Or, maybe he was getting weary in ministry and Paul wanted to encourage him to continue on and steward well the ministry God called him to. Regardless, Paul clearly communicated to Timothy the importance of completing what God called him to do.

Someone said the key to leadership is staying focused. As Community Group leaders, it is essential that we have a clear vision of what God has called us to do. If we don’t, it would be easy to lose focus, take on too much, or bail before we complete the task. Listen, don’t try doing it all. Do what God has called you to do. Sometimes that means saying “No,” even to good things. Jesus was willing and able to do that because He knew what His calling was, and He wouldn’t be deterred. That doesn’t mean He didn’t go above and beyond, it just means that He was crystal clear about His mission and fulfilled His ministry.

Fulfill your ministry. That doesn't mean we silo ourselves and automatically "just say no." But, it does mean that we continually evaluate our calendars and make sure that we are giving our primary calling all it requires.

Surviving the Blur

Sometimes I think the toughest part of writing a sermon is not deciding what to put in, but choosing what you have to leave out.

Recently I gave a talk at LifePoint for our summer teaching series called Stages. My talk was called: Surviving the Blur. You can listen to it here. In the talk I gave 5 insights for succeeding in the blur of parenting young children. I had more material than I could put in the message, so here is some of the material from the talk, and some that was left on the cutting room floor.

• You’ll never get this time back.
• Just because they sometimes make bad choices, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent.
• You have an opportunity to disciple world-changers.
• They are training ground for your spiritual development.
• They already know more than you think they know.
• They hold a very special place in the heart of God.
• You can change their behavior, you can only influence their beliefs.
• You need to invest relationally now so you can influence relationally later.
• They know the real you, whether you know it or not.
• Concern yourself more with being the right kind of parent than having the right kind of children.
• Your children are a stewardship from God.
• Stop striving for perfection, embrace consistency.
• If you have to choose between quality time and quantity time…choose both.
• Be the child you want your children to be.
• Give yourself a break.
• Savor the seconds of this fleeting stage.
• The danger with this stage isn’t life passing you by, it’s you passing life by.
• Teach them what it means to love Jesus.
• You have more to contribute than you think you do.

New Leader's Crash Course

The Small Group Exchange is a great website all about groups. They recently published an article I wrote entitled: "New Leader's Crash Course." You can click here to check it out.

Are you new to small group leadership? Well rest easy friend, we’ve all been new to it at some point! Just think, even Andy Stanley and Bill Hybels...

Reality Check

I don’t blog as much as I would like, I think because I put too much pressure on myself to do it. It becomes too big of a thing and then I don’t get around to it. So, the pressures off. If I get to it great, if not, that’s okay too. Let’s see what happens.

Today I read on a blog about a Pastor from an influential church in GA who committed adultery with his assistant. Truthfully, why don’t these stories surprise me anymore? Not saying I’m not susceptible; maybe that’s the scary part. It prompted me to initiate a discussion with Melody tonight about what we are doing so that doesn’t happen to us. It was a great talk.

I’m not even sure who the blogger is that I read, but he talked about being jaded and he too doesn’t seem to be surprised when this stuff happens. I then read a comment that was posted. This person went on to list the reasons why this kind of thing hasn’t happened to Mark Driscoll. (It didn’t come out of left field, the blogger mentioned Driscoll in his post.) I got worked up a bit when I read what he wrote. I really believe that this has a lot to do with the problem. There is way too much personality worship going on in evangelicalism, at least from what I can see. Mere men are being exalted and the Jesus we admire them for loving is the Jesus that we end up missing. We’ve got lots to learn from each other. But when all is said and all is done, the person we are pointing people to better be Jesus. He’s the Guy that we better be most impressed with.

There’s a real issue when we as church leaders start believing the nice and wonderful things people tell us about ourselves.

YouTube's April Fools--dılɟʞɔɐq ǝldıɹʇ

Funny. Especially the tips on using the new layout.

YouTube's April Fools.

Jesus on 94 North

I was driving into work this morning sipping my OMB/soy/matcha Vivanno when I saw a guy dressed like Jesus (robe, sandals, and long flowing hair) walking down the road, big black bible snuggled close to his chest. Looking back on it, I kind of wish I would have stopped and offered him a ride. At the very least it would have made a good sermon illustration/facebook status/tweet/or blog entry.

I got to thinking, if Jesus were here today, He wouldn't dress like that, and I am pretty sure He'd be driving a car, so I guess it wasn't Him.

Jesus was anything but irrelevant in His day. I wonder why this wannabe would want to present Him as out of touch today. Jesus isn't frozen in time.

This incident brought back to mind a great book I read in 08, "Lord Save Us From Your Followers."

Gotta go iron my robe. Oh yeah, Jesus probably wouldn't have been drinking my Starbucks drink either.

Everything is Amazing, Nobody is Happy

"We live in an amazing, amazing world, and it's wasted on the crappiest generation of spoiled idiots."



Saw this on Kem Meyer's blog and loved it.

As a boy, I remember waking on Saturday mornings (and sometimes late at night) to the smell of Cream of Wheat being cooked in the kitchen by my dad. That may explain why I’m sitting here at 11:50pm eating a bowl while fast forwarding through Sunday’s NASCAR race (maybe the more embarassing confession is that I am watching NASCAR?). I thought about waking Elijah to give it a try, but figured I better not. Breakfast will be here soon enough.
I really like Cream of Wheat.

Final 10 Tips for Young Pastors (31-40)

31. Talk about Jesus every time you preach.
32. Be careful what you say. You’re being watched (and recorded).
33. Don’t return emails when you’re angry.
34. Check to make sure your microphone is turned off before you use the bathroom. Double-check.
35. Check to make sure your zipper is zipped every time before you preach. Double-check.
36. Love your wife more than you love the church. The church is Jesus’ bride, not yours.
37. Always be caught speaking well of others.
38. Compliment, encourage, and build up your staff and volunteers.
39. Hand write thank you notes.
40. Smile and look people in the eyes when you talk to them.

That's it. Hope one of them speaks to you.

Outreach magazine, "Web Exclusives," January/February 2008
By Craig Groeschel

40 Leadership Tips for Young Pastors (21-30)

21. When you have a tough decision to make, but you know it’s right, make it immediately. (Like pulling off a Band-Aid: do it fast, and all at once.)
22. Hire slowly. Fire quickly.
23. You can’t change people. Only God can.
24. Don’t criticize others’ ministries. Yours isn’t nearly as perfect as you think it is.
25. Take care of yourself. Eat right. Rest. Exercise. Take time off. No one else can do that for you.
26. If you don’t take much time off, it’s because you’re proud, and you think you’re more necessary than you really are.
27. Don’t just delegate responsibility. Delegate authority.
28. Laugh frequently.
29. People will leave your church. People you love and trust will leave your church. Don’t take it personally.
30. When you suffer and hurt because of ministry, worship Jesus all the more.

40 Leadership Tips for Young Pastors (11-20)

11. Become close friends with other pastors in your town (as many as you can).
12. Your kids will be grown before you know it. Don’t sacrifice them on the altar of ministry.
13. Your ministry isn’t your god. God is your God.
14. You know how to give and how to minister to others. If you don’t learn how to receive, you’ll burn out and/or die.
15. Studying for sermons doesn’t replace your personal time with God and in His Word.
16. Err on the side of generosity.
17. Believe in people that others overlook.
18. If you’re going to reach people that others aren’t, you’ll have to do things that others won’t.
19. Your integrity matters more than you can imagine.
20. Hire staff members that you like.

21-30 still to come...

40 Leadership Tips for Young Pastors (1-10)

1. Life is short. Make every day count for God’s glory.
2. Don’t take yourself too seriously.
3. Ministry is a marathon, not a sprint.
4. Jesus cares more about the church than you do.
5. You can’t please everyone…so why try?
6. People will criticize you. Quit whining. Get used to it.
7. Three months from now, you won’t even remember most of the things that are bothering you today.
8. You can’t do it all. Stop trying.
9. God called you because He is good, not because you are.
10. If you blame yourself for the bad results in ministry, you’ll likely also take credit for the good results.

...stop by later this week for 11-20


By Craig Groeschel
Outreach Magazine, Web Exclusives

Taking a Risk Underground

This story is from NPR.org. If you haven't heard it yet, it's inspirational, risky, and dangerous. I love it. (If you prefer the audio, you can hear it here)

Julio Diaz has a daily routine. Every night, the 31-year-old social worker ends his hour-long subway commute to the Bronx one stop early, just so he can eat at his favorite diner. But one night last month, as Diaz stepped off the No. 6 train and onto a nearly empty platform, his evening took an unexpected turn.

He was walking toward the stairs when a teenage boy approached and pulled out a knife. "He wants my money, so I just gave him my wallet and told him, 'Here you go,'" Diaz says. As the teen began to walk away, Diaz told him, "Hey, wait a minute. You forgot something. If you're going to be robbing people for the rest of the night, you might as well take my coat to keep you warm." The would-be robber looked at his would-be victim, "like what's going on here?" Diaz says. "He asked me, 'Why are you doing this?'" Diaz replied: "If you're willing to risk your freedom for a few dollars, then I guess you must really need the money. I mean, all I wanted to do was get dinner and if you really want to join me ... hey, you're more than welcome. "You know, I just felt maybe he really needs help," Diaz says.

Diaz says he and the teen went into the diner and sat in a booth. "The manager comes by, the dishwashers come by, the waiters come by to say hi," Diaz says. "The kid was like, 'You know everybody here. Do you own this place?'" "No, I just eat here a lot," Diaz says he told the teen. "He says, 'But you're even nice to the dishwasher.'" Diaz replied, "Well, haven't you been taught you should be nice to everybody?" "Yea, but I didn't think people actually behaved that way," the teen said. Diaz asked him what he wanted out of life. "He just had almost a sad face," Diaz says. The teen couldn't answer Diaz — or he didn't want to. When the bill arrived, Diaz told the teen, "Look, I guess you're going to have to pay for this bill 'cause you have my money and I can't pay for this. So if you give me my wallet back, I'll gladly treat you." The teen "didn't even think about it" and returned the wallet, Diaz says. "I gave him $20 ... I figure maybe it'll help him. I don't know." Diaz says he asked for something in return — the teen's knife — "and he gave it to me."

Afterward, when Diaz told his mother what happened, she said, "You're the type of kid that if someone asked you for the time, you gave them your watch."

"I figure, you know, if you treat people right, you can only hope that they treat you right. It's as simple as it gets in this complicated world."

Is this what Jesus meant when He said, "Give him your coat also..."

Where Have I Been?

I came across the Amazon Kindle for the first time yesterday. I had never heard of it before. Anyone else?
It has some pretty amazing features and capabilities. You can read a well done review and explanation here: